Most people have a plan for when they win the lottery like what the first big splurge will be. Mine is a week in Hawaii sitting on a beach and having some hard bodied 20 something bringing me tropical drinks and applying my sunscreen.

What most people have not planned for is the loss of their partner. Sgt and I have had many frank discussions about this because his career brings the harsh reality of something happening to him while deployed overseas. I know what to expect, what I am entitled to and where he keeps his offshore loot. He has a will in place along with powers of attorney so all of his wishes are known. Sgt has all the bases covered.

I do not.

If something was to happen to me poor Sgt would be up the proverbial creek. Other than a couple of life insurance policies I have nothing. No will, no power of attorney, nothing. Like most women I take care of all the financial matters, I book appointments, I know who the kids doctors are and when their last dental check up was. I know that the baby likes to watch In the Night Garden before going to bed and that we have to read the same four books every night. I know I know our oldest needs me to be engaged in another activity (like dishes or driving) when something important to him has to be discussed. I know our middle son is so damn funny he should have his own one man show. I know if something was to happen to both Sgt and I our sons would be raised by my family.

What I don’t know is if something happened to me would Sgt run into issues with Henry, our son conceived through donor sperm? Sgt is registered on the birth certificate and we had signed all of the documents produced by both our clinic and the company we purchased the sperm from but what does that really mean? Is there some sort of clause I need to have written into a will to ensure Sgt does not lose our son? I have tried Google but the only results it comes up with are the rights of donor conceived children, nothing for the rights of the parents who are not genetically linked. I’m not sure if there is specific Canadian laws or if the laws are provincial. I know I should contact a lawyer and have this looked into but the thought of writing a will scares me. It’s like I am acknowledging that I will die one day and if I do it will happen soon.

I ask you my fellow www’s who have donor conceived children … do you know what your rights are?


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